Maioush

Many people mistake the act of compromise as selling-out or giving in. Compromise to them means giving up something. In actuality if you stay true to the real definition of compromise you will gain a relationship free of petty battles. You will learn how to co-exist in a loving and appreciative way.

So, what does compromise actually mean? It means, “A settlement…by mutual consent reached by concession on both sides…” The key words here are mutual consent. It can’t be a true compromise if one partner doesn’t feel it is mutual. The act of compromise by definition indicates that both partners take an active role in finding a solution. This cannot be done if one or both partners are angry. When beginning to address an issue with your partner I think you should pay attention to the following:

Note: It may be a good idea to let your partner know ahead of time that you have some ideas about a certain situation, and you’d like their insight and help with it. This can help set the tone for positive, non-accusatory discussions. Agree beforehand that if at any time either partner feels angry or upset about the issue you can come back and talk about it at a later date.

1. Talk about the situation openly and calmly with each other. Explain what that situation is to you, and how they feel about it. Then, have your partner do the same.
2. Agree to take turns talking out the compromise. This will allow each partner to fully discuss his or her ideas. Do not interrupt your partner during this time.

   TALKING OUT THE COMPROMISE:

3. Depending on who goes first, decide what possible outcomes or solutions would be acceptable to you. Take a look at it from your partner’s viewpoints and decide if these solutions would be fair to them. What do you feel your partner wants from the situation? Revise your outcomes or solutions around what would still be acceptable to you, but also accounts for your partner’s best interests.
4. The next partner should now follow Step 3.

   Note: Solutions to your problems will vary. For example, if the issue is that you don’t feel you are sharing the workload around the house, your compromise could be: “If you do the dishes, I’ll cook dinner.”

5. Agree on a “DOABLE” compromise. Don’t take one step forward only to fall two steps behind. A compromise should be considered a promise. You don’t want to have one partner following through with their promises, and the other lagging behind. That will only create a relationship filled with resentment.
6. Agree on a future time, right then and there, to talk about things that may come up. Ideally, you’ll want to agree on a date a week in advance. It is crucial for any relationship to have “us” time to talk through issues or problems you may be having. You’ll find a weekly check-in date will help dramatically decrease the amount of flair-ups in your relationship.

Compromise is a way of helping each other find a solution that benefits both people. When you start looking at solutions to your problems this way you can’t help but gain a happier relationship, which in turn creates a happier you!

Well, where do I start?? I read at Dino$ about this and I felt like “I have to watch this”.

After I watch it, it didn’t turn out that surprising as “Thomas” used to be “Tracy” so practically, he/she is a woman, his/her organs are a woman’s organs from the inside, so there is no miracle here!! It’s just sickening tough!!

Watch the videos for more:

Part 1

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Part 2

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Part 3

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Part 4

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Part 5

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I was sooooooo happy last night as I was walking around the office before going home; I discovered something almost brought tears to my eyes, Yasmeen :)

Yasmeen (jasmine) is one of the things that remind me of Jordan a lot, out old house was surrounded by it, I remember when I was a little girl I used to make necklaces, bracelets, and head bands out of Yasmeen, when I grew up a little, and we moved to another house, I was so happy that the street we live at is full of it, almost every day in summer after either school or later work, me and my friend Laila, would walk around the house and enjoy the smell of Yasmeen, we usually end up with a chips and  “shaneena” :)

I got some to myself and out it in my ‘very old” car :D , you can’t imagine how much i enjoyed my drive home :)

It just feels great, now I have an extra reason to love where I work besides that it’s right next to Disney Land :)

And enjoy the song :) A7la layali layali zaman. Allah 3a hadeek el ayam, wallah zaman… wallah zaman, ah law terja3 hal ayam…

o ya ree7et yasmeen el dar :)

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 Princess N tagged me (thanks sweetie, I’m late i know) :) , as well as Wonders (my apologies sweets, i lost track :( )

The rules are:

1. Post 10 random things about yourself,

2. Choose 5 people to tag and a reason you chose each person

3. Leave them each a comment directing them to your blog so they know they are it

4. You can’t tag the person who tagged you

5. As a courtesy to the person who tagged you, please let them know when you have posted

Alright, let’s do this, oh god..  This is gonna be like 10 posts in one, Allah y3eenkom LOL!

1. I’m always cold, no I’m serious, ALWAYS, today it’s like 75 outside and I have the heater on RIGHT NOW :D

2. Do you remember Monica from friends?? She is so crazy about where stuff should be and the way that things should go, I’m the same of not worse… simple example: the tag on the bed sheets, it has to be at the left down corner of the bed, when people do it for me, I wait till they leave and I fix it behind their back :oops:

3. I don’t eat more than a pregnant woman!! :@ I was just being a good host when Nido was here, I mean come on, it’s not appropriate to let her eat by herself sa7?? :)

4. dancing in the car??? Oh my god it’s so possible ya 7aki LOL! :D, I do ALL the time :) once I hear a song I like, yadii el fdee7a!! I’m dancing and I don’t stop until o notice that someone is looking :oops:

5.  I wear glasses, yep!! That’s right, I used to be obsessed of contacts, I hates the glasses, but for few months now, I became lazy and I just wear my glasses.

6. I got lost once in Amman, and ended up in the royal palace (I still don’t know how I ended up there)!!

7. I cry easily, I might look tough for some people, but I’m one of those who cries 3ala atfah el asbab!! :S

8. I LOVE guys with gray hair, that’s why I’m in love with George Clooney’s look :dreamy eyes:

9. I hate history, I used to cause sooooooooooooo many troubles in history class, and I got kicked out of it several time, bad bad bad Maioush!

10. if someone gets on my nerves, I can be very rude, I smile a lot and all, bs ma y’3orkom el mazhar :) .. when I’m mean.. I’m mean!! For real, I always’ end up hurting people’s feelings!

As always, I’m not gonna tag anyone, but if you would like to go ahead and do it, please do :D

I really need to talk about this, I feel like there is a huge bubble in my chest, does that sound weird? It’s not the emptiness feeling no, and it’s not like I fell a huge rock setting on my chest Kaman no.. I feel like there is a huge amount of air a huge bubble stopping me from breathing, it starts at my throat all the way till my lower part of my chest, it’s like my throat and lungs are full of cold air!!

I hate it when people yell at me, well you will all say “bit we all do”‘ but here is the thing with me, if you really want to tell me something, try not to scream cuz will get nothing but a silent person, I won’t say one word, no matter what you yell, I just freeze, completely freeze, I don’t respond to screaming or yelling, I’m a calm person my nature, I don’t believe in screaming an yelling, and just because I don’t yell back it doesn’t mean I can’t, it’s just I don’t want to, I will never yell back, or even respond to the person as log as he/she is yelling.

This is a question for all the people who usually yell at other people, why the hell you scream?? It’s not like it makes you stronger, and what ever it is are you trying to tell me, I will definitely get waaaaaaaaaay better if you say it in a lower voice, I’m telling you people I completely freeze, I just HATE yelling, add to that end up crying most if the time, and I hate that too :(

Please people, please, stop yelling at screaming at each other, I beg you, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it.

And I end up hating the person who keeps yelling at me, enno I hear you, bekaffi meshan allah! :(

I had to post this guys, I mean seriously.. I have to share the laugh :D

LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!

Friendayeh wrote,

As we talked in  Part 1 how men are really simple to deal with, but they are diffenetly now stupid, I’ll go int his part about chemistry and blaming men.

Psychologically, all our old words and body language together are our “defense system.” They’re there to defend us against threats and pain – but we use them all the time! We use them from the moment we lay eyes on a man, even before he opens his mouth!

We behave as though we’re in trouble, or not good enough, or about to be hurt – before we even know much at all about the man!

This is where Chemistry comes in.

If the chemistry is strong enough, we’ll sort of sail through the first few months of dating. He won’t pay too much attention to our defenses, even if they irritate him. He’ll pretend to listen while we talk and apologize for misreading our signals.

But then, sooner or later, the chemistry fades a little and the relationship gets real. All our defenses that have kept us from truly connecting with him get even stronger – now we can feel the tension. We can feel the distance between us. We can feel how he’s pulling away.

And we blame him.

And we say – “I should have known he was a jerk.”

 And then your friends support the “he’s a jerk” labelling because they don’t know, anymore than you did, how it all really happened.

We women are all willing to say “I’m not pretty enough,” or “I’m not good enough.” We’re willing to put ourselves down for who we are (and really hurt ourselves).

And beating ourselves up doesn’t help. In fact, it lowers our self-confidence, makes us feel angry about men, and makes things worse.

What does help is to really look at ways we can do things differently.

And sometimes, doing things differently takes different relationship skills.

Real spontaneity and naturalness – Authenticity is very, very attractive to men. Because it communicates CONFIDENCE in ourselves.

But most of the time, our old words and our old patterns actually are telling men, from the moment they talk with us, that we have absolutely NO confidence in ourselves!

 I was talking to one of my friends, she’s been married for almost 2 years now, she was complaining on how things are not going “so great” between the two, after listening to her for more than an hour, she felt much better that she actually was able to “talk” to someone about it, which made me think, when a relationship goes sour, one of the first things to suffer is communication. If you can’t communicate with each other, then there is no possible way to salvage the relationship. The thing to do is to prevent communication from ever being a problem. One of the most important aspects of this is to learn how to be a good listener. I guess what I’m about to say might help a lot:

1. Give Them Your Undivided Attention
   When your partner wants to talk, put everything else out of your mind and actually be there with them while they are talking. You cannot possibly listen to them if you are thinking about other things you would rather be doing, or have to do.
2. Listen To What Is Actually Being Said
   This is especially true if you are in a disagreement. It is very easy to pick out the things in what your partner is saying that you want to hear and can throw back at them. This is not some high school debate class where you score points for winning an argument, this is your sweetheart and your actions here and now will dictate the course of the rest of your life together!
3. Look At Them When They Are Talking To You
   Have you ever tried to talk to someone that refused to make eye contact with you? It is very disheartening, especially when you have something important to say. When talking with your sweetie, actually look at them and not around the room.
4. Notice the Hidden Emotional Tone of Your Partner
   Very often, your partner won’t say exactly what is on their mind straight away and it is up to you to draw them out. By looking for their emotional tone, through their body language, voice inflections etc., you will get a very good indicator of what is actually bothering them and also how it is affecting them.
5. Acknowledge Your Partner
   A correct acknowledgement can very often completely resolve a dispute in one go. It has a two-fold effect: 1. It tells your partner that you have heard and understand what they are saying and 2. It makes them feel better by releasing some of the emotional baggage that may have built up on the subject. A good rule of thumb when there is a lot of emotional baggage attached to a situation, is to acknowledge them by repeating in your own words what they have just said to you.
6. Remain Calm
   If your sweetheart is angry, very often they will lash out at you because you are there and are someone they can take their frustration out on. While this may not be pleasant and the most ideal way to handle a situation, I’m afraid it is part of the job description of being a sweetheart. Realize that it is just a way for your sweetie to vent and resist the urge to get angry back, it will only make things worse.

Happy listening everybody :)