So is it in me or am I faking it??

Really!!! am I calm person or am I just faking it??

I mean whenever people argue I keep looking at them how easy for them to lose their temper and start saying stuff that really hurts the person in front of them, of course once they do that, it takes both parties forever to get over what have been said!!

Seriously.. I think that hurting someone is the easiest thing any human being can do.. as for me it’s the hardest thing I can do ever in my life, not because I can’t, I really wish that is the reason.. it’s because I really suck when it comes to apologizing, so I always choose to count to 20 if u have to just because I don’t wanna say something wrong..

“Some people think of me as :la2eemeh”, cuz I always think of the way back when it comes to these things, but I don’t think that is the bad thing, we all should do that, if being la2eemeh means taking into consideration people’s feeling, let it be “la2maneh”.

Back to my question, so am I a calm person or am I faking it?? I mean I do get mad, really mad, but you would never know, cuz I never throw it in your face, it all stays INSIDE me!! And I mean really inside me, I would keep my calm voice, and my smile on my face, although I would be burning inside, I feel like screaming, yelling, and sometimes breaking things, but do I do that??? NEVER… NEVER EVER happened before, I don’t know what happens to me, but the only thought that comes to my mid at that moment is “you should stay calm, don’t lose your temper, your calm will eventually calm the person in front of you, don’t respond, CAAAAAAAAAAAAALM DOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWN!!!”

I’m not gonna lie to you, it’s the hardest thing any body can do, but I still manage to do it, I would feel sometimes that there is a mountain standing on my chest, and my throat starts to hurt SO BAD!!.. the cool thing is after one hour, I calm down from the inside, I can’t stay mad for long, once the other person is calm already, I start feeling ok, like nothing happened :) .. Cool NO? ;)

But that does NOT mean that you can get mad me as much as you want.. as they say “etaqi shar el 7aleem etha ‘3adeb” I turn into a volcano .. o eb3ed 3an weshi el sa3adi :D

14 Responses to “So is it in me or am I faking it??”

  1. Oriental Arabesque Says:

    i think you’re a rational person and that’s an excellent thing…it’s great to be able to control urself..manage ur anger and count to 10 before u say anything u might regret later on…cause really some ppl lose their sense when they get mad and they hurt others badly..and sometimes it’s irreversible…
    it’s so easy to lose takes a second to do that..but maintaining relationships and friendships is harder..

    of course some take advantage of this point and think ur a cold person and nothing will make u they push u to the limits…ur just like my mom…she’s a calm person in general and very rational..doesn’t get mad 3ala ayaa shee, doesn’t make a big deal out of everything and even when she wants to t3ateb she does it very nicely and calmly…but when she gets mad ya sater!! she becomes really scary!!

    i took me a lot of effort and self training to become more calm and to control my anger…cause i’m a bit 3asabeyeh…and now specially at work i know how to control myself and no one can tell if i’m mad or upset…it takes lots of effort but it’s not hard to achieve as long as the person is aware of this point and wants to work on it and change it..

  2. Qabbani Says:

    hey well u faking it :P

    hehehe , hmm let say your Calm and doing good ..

  3. Jumana Says:

    it is not easy to stay cal all the time…if you have that extraordinary thing then you really should keep it and appreciate it…good for you :)

  4. aya Says:

    ya bay ya gabbani sho enk 5feef dm :S

  5. aya Says:


  6. Qabbani Says:


  7. Mazz Says:

    you wish you’re faking it

  8. theone Says:

    maybe you didn’t meet that one who really can irritate you that good! although i don’t know you but still everyone has a limit and I think you didn’t cross yours yet.

  9. asoom Says:

    I would say for not outwardly reacting to your inner rage you’re a calm person!

  10. Maioush Says:

    Oriental Arabesque:
    People think that when you are calm that means you don’t get mad, they don’t realize that it’s really hard for people like me to control themselves to be calm, well good for your mom, and yeah… I’m like that too, when I get mad.. 5alas that’s it for me.

    Yeha I guess.

    Thanks dear, well in general I am, but I do get mad from the inside a lot, I don’t if it’s a good think to keep it like that.

    LOL malek :D

    I son’t know, I wanna get mad heak for the sake of it.

    The One:
    Believe me I met so many people who irritate me more than you can imagine, and I did get mad at times, but in general, I control myself, control it in away that sometimes I feel like I’m gonna kill myself :)

    Yeah, so I guess I’m not faking it :)

  11. Qabbani Says:

    who Comment by my name !!

    Aya , are u Aya ma 3’erha , then u know 2ni 5afefe dam :p ,

    thank u for the note , Mai didt know 2ni akter 5afef dam

  12. theone Says:

    well, eza wa9alt ma3k to feel that you wanna kill urself then lazem tnafsi 3n 3’adbk a7san l2no el nas sar7a msh kolhm bstahlo tekbti ele fekee.

  13. theone Says:

    and about the theme, yes i noticed that this is the first blog that looks like mine. ma e7na el jooz la6sheno mn wordpress :P

  14. aya Says:

    aa aya ma 3’earha o sar 3nde 5bra b 5efet dmk ur right:D

Leave a Reply

You can add images to your comment by clicking here.

Filled Under: Personal