So is it in me or am I faking it??
Really!!! am I calm person or am I just faking it??
I mean whenever people argue I keep looking at them how easy for them to lose their temper and start saying stuff that really hurts the person in front of them, of course once they do that, it takes both parties forever to get over what have been said!!
Seriously.. I think that hurting someone is the easiest thing any human being can do.. as for me it’s the hardest thing I can do ever in my life, not because I can’t, I really wish that is the reason.. it’s because I really suck when it comes to apologizing, so I always choose to count to 20 if u have to just because I don’t wanna say something wrong..
“Some people think of me as :la2eemeh”, cuz I always think of the way back when it comes to these things, but I don’t think that is the bad thing, we all should do that, if being la2eemeh means taking into consideration people’s feeling, let it be “la2maneh”.
Back to my question, so am I a calm person or am I faking it?? I mean I do get mad, really mad, but you would never know, cuz I never throw it in your face, it all stays INSIDE me!! And I mean really inside me, I would keep my calm voice, and my smile on my face, although I would be burning inside, I feel like screaming, yelling, and sometimes breaking things, but do I do that??? NEVER… NEVER EVER happened before, I don’t know what happens to me, but the only thought that comes to my mid at that moment is “you should stay calm, don’t lose your temper, your calm will eventually calm the person in front of you, don’t respond, CAAAAAAAAAAAAALM DOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWN!!!”
I’m not gonna lie to you, it’s the hardest thing any body can do, but I still manage to do it, I would feel sometimes that there is a mountain standing on my chest, and my throat starts to hurt SO BAD!!.. the cool thing is after one hour, I calm down from the inside, I can’t stay mad for long, once the other person is calm already, I start feeling ok, like nothing happened :) .. Cool NO? ;)
But that does NOT mean that you can get mad me as much as you want.. as they say “etaqi shar el 7aleem etha ‘3adeb” I turn into a volcano .. o eb3ed 3an weshi el sa3adi :D
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